Spectre (2015)

It’s a bit more than an hour like I said on twitter , but here we go! I promised you guys a review this week and I went to see Spectre tonight so that’s your review!

Spectre (2015)
 Dir. Sam Mendes
 Writ. John Logan, Neal Purvis
 Stars: Daniel Craig, Christopher Waltz, Lea Seydoux
 Rated PG-13
 148 mins.
 IMDB 7.4

Before I go into this, I realize I’ve never mentioned James Bond. I’ve never reviewed another Bond movie either. That is going to make this difficult for some of you to understand because I’m going to compare to other Daniel Craig Bond films to explain things.

Other than Daniel Craig Bond, I have to admit, I only ever liked Pierce Brosnan. I KNOW! I know, everybody hates Pierce Brosnan Bond but I liked him, okay? That said, I really only LOVE Daniel Craig Bond of all the Bonds so far.

Now, onto Spectre!

The short description is: It’s not as good emotion-wise as Skyfall, it isn’t as good action-wise as Casino Royale, but it’s a thousand times better than the shit-fest that was Quantum of Solace.

The long version is this: Spectre is really good. It’s just not AS good as it could have been.

The story that James Bond (Daniel Craig) finds himself in this time around is that it’s the fallout from Skyfall and in the wake of M’s death, the terror attack on headquarters, and the upcoming merger with MI5. Bond is off the grid (well he thinks) in an attempt to find a dead man from his past after the old M’s dying message to him sends him on the hunt.

The pros far outweigh the cons in this movie, so we’ll start with them:

  • More Q! I love that guy. He’s snarky and amusing
  • The lovely cars that ultimately die are just as erotically beautiful as always (yes, I said erotically, don’t judge my strange fetish for cars)
  • The opening action sequence is VERY thrilling, possibly the most thrilling of any opening Bond action scenes I’ve seen
  • Andrew Scott as C! I love him! Also I loved C sorta flirting with Bond at the start there, it was amusing.
  • Ralph Fiennes as the new M is always fun
  • The MOST impressive thing of all: none of the women Bond banged died!

To expand upon those pros, you have to start with Q (Ben Whishaw) appearing outside the lab! I loved seeing the nerdy tech genius out in the field doing his stuff. It was very fun to see the gadgeteer doing the spy stuff for a bit.

The caaaarrrssss *overly sexual noises inserted here*. As always, James Bond has an Aston. It’s his trademark. The DB10 that he crashed drove in this one was just as beautiful as all Aston Martins always are (which is to say immensely) but the real showstopper this time around is the Jaguar C-X75 concept car! It looks like the bastard child of a Lamborghini and a Koenigsegg and sounds like sex in a bottle during the chase scene.

I want to rub my body all over this car

This one, too

Oh yeah, I was reviewing a movie, not the cars. Woops!

Expanding on the opening sequence is unnecessary, it was cool, the end. Same with C and M, so let’s get to the last one, and it’s a big one!

One of the trademarks of James Bond is how he fucks anything that moves and most of the time the girl he screws ends up dead. Sometimes more than one girl ends up dead in the case of Casino Royale. James bond is a misogynist. We all know this. Even Daniel Craig knows this and is very open about his distaste for the character.  So to have James Bond have sex with two different women and neither of them (at least as far as we know) end up dead is a whole new playing field. Also, not just does the main love interest not die this time, but she gets to help kill one of her would-be killers.

This by no means makes James Bond movies not sexist movies, but it is definitely a whole new sort of Bond we’re seeing, the same way Skyfall showed us a Bond who had feelings and regrets and who felt loss. (i.e., was Human)

The cons are really only one very simple one:

  • It just wasn’t as interesting as it could have been.

There was nothing wrong with the movie. There just were multiple points where I began to wonder ‘alright, is this ever going to end now?’. There as no reason for this movie to be so damn long. There were definitely scenes that could’ve been shortened but weren’t and you can feel that dragging along. If this movie had been more emotional and shorter, it could’ve been just as good as if not better than Skyfall, but instead it had some very slow and lengthy parts and you didn’t really feel it as much this time around. Bond was aloof, which is his usual, but in Skyfall they set us up for a Bond with weaknesses and feelings, so it was very noticeable.

All in all, this was a very enjoyable movie.

My Rating: 6/10

About J. Chelsea Williford

Movie addict, reader, writer, pop culture lover.
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